


Breaking News: Ladybug Unmasked by Local Class!

by bloviate



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Gen, Humor, Marinette is Done, Marinette works on her Tackling Skills, Nadja is Done with these Children and their Theories, The Class Knows, absolute crack, but I made myself laugh, i don't know where this came from
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-25 11:50:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10763667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bloviate/pseuds/bloviate
Summary: In which Marinette tackles her classmates and carries off her crush, The Class is way too smug, and Nadja Chamack just wants to fill her Friday hour.





	Breaking News: Ladybug Unmasked by Local Class!

**Breaking News: Ladybug Unmasked by Local Class!**

April 29th 2017

"Local Troisième students at the Collège Françoise Dupont claim to have discovered the secret identity of Paris's favorite superhero, Ladybug! I, Nadja Chamack, TVi News, sat down with the students of the targeted class to discuss their discovery."

The image of Nadja is replaced by that of red-haired girl with black-framed glasses. She looks directly into the camera until Nadja clears her throat, bringing the attention back to her.

"I am here with Alya Césaire, who heads the claims that her class has revealed the identity of Ladybug. Ms. Césaire, what do you have to say about your claims?"

"Oh, we've definitely discovered Ladybug," Alya says, her voice sure and smug. "For a superhero, Marinette isn't exactly overflowing with finesse."

In the background, Marinette can be seen passing by. Hearing this claim, she  tripped over a crack in the sidewalk, and in a whorl of flailing limbs, made her way over to her friend.

"Ms. Dupain-Cheng, what do you have to say for this claim?"

Marinette glared at Nadja, at the camera, and at Alya. "No comment," she grudgingly replied, eyes narrowed on her friend.

The screen fades back to Nadja Chamack standing in front of a still of the Eiffel Tower. "Ms. Dupain-Cheng continued to deny comment, and instead dragged Ms. Césaire away from the interview. Instead, our investigative team turned to a different member of the class—you may know him as Stoneheart, the very first akuma victim. However, his classmates know him by a different name; Ivan Bruel."

Ivan is on the screen, awkwardly fiddling with his hands. Mylène stands at his side, smiling up at him. Beside the pair, Nadja holds out her microphone.

"Mr. Bruel, as the first akuma victim, do you feel that you have a special relationship with Ladybug?"

Ivan shrugs, scratching the back of his head.

"How do you respond to claims that Ms. Dupain-Cheng is Ladybug, the superhero who saved you not once, but twice? What was your involvement in the discovery of Ms. Dupain-Cheng's identity?"

"He was actually the first to suggest Marinette is Ladybug!" Mylène says. "He told me he never thought it was supposed to be a secret!"

Abruptly, Ivan is tackled off-screen by a blue-haired blur.

The blur stands up, revealing Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

"I'm _not_ Ladybug, stop interviewing my friends!" Marinette exclaims, grabbing Mylène by the hand to pull her away.

"See how strong she is!" Mylène shouts as she is pulled away.

The screen doesn't fade back to Nadja Chamack in her studio—instead, Sabrina walks on-screen, shoulders hunched. She glances back and forth between the camera and Nadja, then shuffles towards Nadja and whispers into the news anchor's ear.

A surprised look passes over Nadja's face, quickly follwed by a schooled expression. Sabrina turns and runs away, and the camera centers on Nadja.

"I've just been informed that a third student, who wishes to remain nameless, is coming forth with new information regarding the identity of Ladybug." Nadja looks off-screen, addressing the nameless informant. "Tell us, what do you have to say about the claims your classmates have made?"

"Well, they aren't wrong," comes a voice from off-screen, distorted so as to be unrecognizable. "I myself idolize Ladybug, so you can imagine what a shock it was to find out that half my class was convinced _Marinette_ is Ladybug. But then I thought about it, and really, who else would come up with a phrase like 'time to de-evilize'? Sorry Ladybug, your Marinette is showing. Evilize isn't a word, you can't _de_ -evilize something!"

"Chloé!"

Nadja's eyes widen, and a split second later Chloé Bourgeois is being chased across the screen by Marinette. The camera follows the two girls' progress, zooming in when Marinette finally tackles Chloé. Indistinct shouts are heard, followed by an indignant shout of "It just isn't a word!" and "I'd like to see you come up with better!"

Once again, Nadja Chamack stands on screen in her studio. "With the incensed Marinette picking off interviewers one by one, we turned to a source who could not be intimidated by the young collège student; her teacher."

Nadja Chamack stands half-facing Mme. Bustier, who wears a small grin. In the background, two bright blue eyes can be seen peering through the small window in the classroom door.

"Mme. Bustier, tell us when you began to suspect that one of your students was moonlighting—or in this case, day-lighting—as a superhero?"

"I started noticing that Marinette had to use the bathroom right before an akuma attack was announced," Mme. Bustier replies, her eyes unfocused in memory. She leans against her desk, pointedly ignoring the blue eyes glaring at her. "But I dismissed it as teen love—after all, she would always ask to leave shortly after, or shortly before, another student asked the same. But it just didn't add up."

"What did you start to suspect, then?"

"Well, you see, I did suspect that Marinette was related to the akuma attacks—I suspected her to be le Papillon."

There is a sharp knock at the door—the blue eyes have disappeared. Both women ignore it.

"Le Papillon?" Nadja replies, shock evident in her tone.

Mme. Bustier nods enthusiastically. "Yes, le Papillon. Marinette is a popular girl, funny and smart. No one would ever suspect her to be Paris' _super-villain._ Which is exactly why I felt it was such a clever ruse. I'd planned on giving her extra-credit for it, I was so impressed. But then…"

"Something happened to change your opinion?"

Mme. Bustier nods again. "You see, as I was grading one of Marinette's homework assignments, I noticed something that clued me in immediately. I have the paper with me—hold on—" Mme. Bustier rummages around in her desk for a few moments before rearing back, holding a crumpled paper triumphantly. "Here it is. This is the very sentence I read when I realized—well, she wrote 'cat-based fairytales are _paws-itively_ predictable.' Do you understand? _paws-itively._ I knew at once that my student was actually Chat Noir."

Nadja's eyes widen, and she leans forward, eager in her next line of questioning.

"What brought you to assume that Chat Noir is the one who would make such a pun? When did you come to the realization that Marinette is Ladybug, and not her partner? How does it make you feel that Paris' spotted heroine makes cat puns while doing her homework?"

Mme. Bustier's eyes widen as well. "Marinette is Ladybug? How did I not see it, that makes so much more sense! Who else would come up with a word like 'de-evilize'?"

The screen goes back to Nadja Chamack in her studio. She stares down the camera with a serious eye. "We've heard from Marinette's classmates and teacher, but we wanted to answer a greater question; was her class the only one who recognized Ladybug as Marinette Dupain-Cheng? We took to the hallways of the collège to find out."

The image becomes one of a bustling hallway, students walking with backpacks hitched high. Nadja stands with six students, younger and older than Marinette's class. She holds her microphone up to the closest one, who peers into the camera eagerly.

"Tell us, what do you have to say on Marinette Dupain-Cheng."

"She's Ladybug all right," the nearest one says.

"She one told me that Ladybug _definitely_ has an eight-pack, that Ladybug is shredded. And I knew; only Ladybug would ever call Ladybug shredded," the next one comments.

"Oh yeah," says the third, bobbing her head. "Marinette was helping me with my homework one day when there was an akuma attack. She helped me hide, then said 'bug out!' and started running away."

"I saw a video online where Ladybug was talking to Adrien Agreste, and Ladybug says 'people always say to me, Ladybug, how do you do it?' But then she looked at Adrien and she said 'And—I—ah—oh—blegh—bug out!' And I knew."

Nadja nods her head, turns to the fifth student—but the camera suddenly swerves, and the lone figure of Marinette is seen. She is standing at the end of the hall, her eyes focused above the camera. The camera starts to shake, then moves backwards as the cameraman starts stepping back. Marinette takes a step forward.

Off-screen, Nadja's voice pleads, "Theo—Theo don't look at her, focus on me. She can't hurt you—Theo!"

The camera drops, the screen cracks, causing a double-image. In the double-image, a pair of flats can be seen slowly making their way towards the camera.

Back in the studio, Nadja stares down the cameraman before glancing back at the camera. "Ah—our _brave_ cameraman is fine, and made it out of the encounter with minimal bruising. But after hearing from so many students who are convinced of Ms. Dupain-Cheng being Ladybug, we sought comment from the girl herself. She provided one comment—'If I'm Ladybug, Adrien Agreste is Chat Noir.' Her tone indicated that she thought this statement absurd, but here at TVi news, we seek truth. So, we finally asked Mr. Agreste to sit down with us, and what did he say?"

The screen goes black

"If I'm Ladybug," a voice over in a young girl's voice can be heard. "Adrien Agreste is Chat Noir…"

The screen shows Nadja and Adrien now, sitting at a table facing each other.

"What do you make of this statement, Mr. Agreste? Is there any weight behind it? And do you believe, like your classmates, that Ms. Dupain-Cheng is Ladybug?"

Adrien smiles at his hands, which are folded in his lap. "I suppose the secret is out. Marinette is Ladybug just as much as I am Chat Noir."

"Dude's not Chat Noir!" An off-screen voice shouts.

"He likes to think he's Chat Noir," another voice adds.

"Please, Mr. Agreste, are you confirming or denying that you are Chat Noir and Ms. Dupain-Cheng is Ladybug?"

Adrien's eyes go to someone off-screen, and a charismatic grin lights his face. Without looking back to the camera, Adrien speaks. "I sup- _paws_ that it's _purr-_ fectly acceptable to _cat_ -mit it; I am the su- _purr_ hero, Chat Noir."

Off-screen, someone screams. Marinette appears on-screen only for a moment. She grabs Adrien by the arm and throws him over her shoulder.

" _Purr-incess_ , I had no idea you felt this way about me!" Adrien can be heard saying off-screen. Another shrill scream follows shortly.

The screen cuts back to Nadja Chamack.

"The consensus indicates Marinette Dupain-Cheng as Ladybug, but—ugh, cut! Cut!"

"Come on Nadja, we just need to finish this." Alec pinches the bridge of his nose.

"I can't!" Nadja exclaims, frustration apparent in her tone. "This is ridiculous. Marinette watches Manon for goodness sake. That girl is just about as much Ladybug as—as—well, she is as much Ladybug as Adrien Agreste is Chat Noir!"

"What do we do with this report then? All this footage?"

Nadja sighs, running her hands over her pockets for her phone—all the footage had been downloaded and stored on her phone, courtesy of one of the collège students, a tech-savvy boy named Max.

"Where did I put it…?" Nadja wonders moving across the studio towards her purse.

In the distance, Marinette presses delete on a phone that wasn't hers, adding Nadja Chamack to her list of victims.

 


End file.
